Description...

Both hands...

All fingers bent permanently in the direction of the keyboard,

My pinky straightened to perfection for the shift key in constant reach...

I closed my eyes...Slowed my breathing... For a change my music vibes at a medium volume—

My arms then folded across my stomach, hands locked so tight,

I'm not hot, nor cold, the medium feeling consumed me... Unsure of which side to choose... Which feeling to feel...in a daze I was on my on wave...

I saw what I wanted; I felt what I wanted...

A breeze kissed my right cheek... Oh perfect timing...

Nothing mattered for some reason though I knew everything bothering me... Still it didn't matter here...

What's a life now?

I'm a being, who cares if I'm human... I'm here.

This bed of flowers so different from concrete, how I sleep? —

So sleet, no sweet, no fleet, from feet, in my seat, this Indian style.

Still here though, just being.

Seen eye to eye with no one—I'm here on my own.

I watched myself sleep that night...

Slow breathes, fetal position In the middle of my space, I didn't move at all.

So when the sun rubbed my back, plucked my eyes, consumed the room, I'd assume..."do I have to" ... "Let's get this over with"

Whispered to my space "I'll see you soon"

I breathed the same air as they... What makes me so different? I don't desire such... I just wanna make my way, ya know?

But I'm still here.

I can't speak, my tongue glued to my throat whenever I speak a feeling... My hearts accelerates uncontrollably, and then I shut down...

But I'm still here... Or am I really? Do I want to be? Why should I? Why shouldn't I? What's here for me?

Everything is taken, out of reach…

I've worked way to hard to give up ... No I've worked way to hard to stand still—

Steady climbing not realizing the hole gets deeper the more I climb so to think I'm progressing is a illusion for how hard I've tried, I'm fried, then I lied…

Back in my space,

The moon is grace, no bliss, for this kiss, from the moon, flirting with the stars, so many I can't choose one...it’s just begun...

I'll be here.... I assume